Would you mind if I told you a secret?
No… Okay so here it is: Negative comments about your weight can annoy you about as much as negative comments about your mental health. Think about it… People constantly telling you…
“You’re so skinny”
“You’re so tiny. Gosh”
“You seem sad”
“Are you okay? Are you depressed”
It’s all equally annoying right? But do you know why it annoys you so much? Because you don’t like when people acknowledge what you think/know is already wrong. Now I’m no expert but I’ll bet that at least half the people who hear comments similar to the ones above have learned to shrug or laugh while saying “I’m fine” when really they’re fuming on the inside because somebody called BINGO on their life. So now there they are trying their best to distract everyone and make themselves seem happy or seem unfazed but the gag is ” A happy/unbothered person doesn’t have to continuously remind themselves that they are happy or unbothered… they just are” As a person who has suffered for years of “just laughing it off”, trying to cover up what’s really bothering you can be a pain and truth be told it doesn’t help.
I know it sucks when you’re kind and sensitive and everyone else around you is careless with their mouths and what flows out of them but its ok. Take the energy to not be upset at them. Instead SCREAM. WRITE. CRY YOUR EYES OUT. Admit to yourself in some form that “Yes I’m not well. Yes I overthink EVERYTHING. Yes I’m sad sometimes and I don’t feel like talking. Yes I know I’m small. Yes I know I’m on the heavier side” Beat those people to the punch and embrace those gorgeous imperfections. They are apart of you and while you may hate when their verbally thrown back to you by others, when YOU learn to accept them, that’s when you gain the most power.
I know it’s easier said than done. I know people are probably always telling you to “just be happy” “just go eat” “just go work out” “just go out and enjoy life” and that’s easy for them to do when they aren’t in your shoes or when they’re oblivious to your situation. I know you aren’t fond of people like this so I won’t be the person who tells you that. Instead I’ll say your problems aren’t mediocre or second hand and I AM HERE FOR YOU!!!! Everyone goes through things including me and wtbs: I want to share with you my coping mechanism: music.
Yes I did say music. I know a few beats won’t change whatever your problem is but if your listening to the right song, it does make the problems you have a little less dense. So from me to you, here’s a small playlist that will hopefully make you feel a lot lighter or willing to confront a few things.
- Higher Than This- Ledisi
- The Answer to Why- Ledisi
- Everything Changes- Ledisi
- There’s Gotta Be More to Life- Stacie Orrico
- You Gotta Be- Des’ree
- Where You Belong- Huckapoo
- Find Yourself in You- Everlife
- One of Them Days- Kiana Ledé
- Heavy- Kiana Ledé
- Sleep Deprived (with Lute, Omen, Mez, and Davionne)
- PTSD (with (Omen, Mereba, Deante’ Hitchcock & St. Beauty)
- Glockenspiel Song- Dog Is Dead
- Wild Things- Alessia Cara